Sunday Scribbling #71 DECISION.

Decision, love the word, easy for me, difficult for some.
Making the decision has always been easy. Should I shouldn’t I, will I won’t I, can I can’t I, these questions have flavoured my life, caused many to reel, to gasp with shock/horror as they asked “she’s not going to is she”? Some decisions were extremely bad, some ridiculous, some embarrassing, many on a whim, many on an impulse, most without a thought of the consequences or the effect on the people involved. Each time I prepared myself to either suffer or relish the consequences well I thought I did, invariably I left debris, yet lessons were learnt.

The decisions made for me, supposedly in my best interest, caused great personal sadness – too much to mention here! Learned behaviour was my advisor – yeah, make that decision a little voice would say – go on I dare you. Making a decision became a form of approval seeking. That was until I woke up, found the formula, came out of the fog and made the best decision; to grow up – now that was a decision!

For me the ability to make a decision is admirable. However making the decision without careful consideration can often be dangerous. Hearts broken, lives in turmoil, the outcome frequently not what was initially expected. So when I consider the decision makers who blunder along in their positions of power oft making a decision frequently with a hidden agenda I realise my decision making episodes weren’t that bad after all.

Decision making now, I'm Over it!